world of my own

Friday, March 30, 2007

met up with madam after so long for two days! it was fruitful but ended up i spent rather alot of money.hahas.

had bk breakfast with her at bugis on wed! i love breakfast meals compared to others. no idea why but its appetising. a pity they only sell during mornings when we are usually working or sleeping.hahas. we were early, many shops were not opened. after much pondering, i eventually bought a flowery silvery bag after much consideration. hahas. it feels great to buy something after a while at times.

on fri we met up for dinner after work. i was so lazy during work and was waiting for time to pass so that i can finally go out and shop after consecutively working closing the past few days. i am really tired. luckily the next few days would be off days and morning shifts before closing starts once again. anyway we had yoshi for dinner and started our shopping sprees at marina square. intended to use the vouchers i got but in the end we didn't used it at all sadly. we bought tees from another shop instead. but i am happy cos i finally found one nice BROWN shirt after searching for many months. lol. we managed to catch a fashion show there as well. it was rather cool to see it real life.

its great shopping with madam cos we can talk easily and we have similar tastes at least in some ways =)

- peace out

Thursday, March 22, 2007

thurs:

its been a long while since i last caught a movie. met up with amelia finally after so long since we last seen each other. watched mr bean holiday movie at j8! it was okay but not as good as we expected though. hahas. we had lunchie at yoshi, at the same time discussing about our choices which i still haven't made up my mind totally yet.

fri:

today was bar day for me. perhaps because the crowd wasn't tat great so i could manage it rather well except i am still untidy as pointed by my manager. okay i guess i still have to improve on my tidiness further. its an improvement and i muz strive to be even better. i am thankful for the patient encouragements from my fellow colleagues despite my blurness and ignorance, asking and doing stupid things at times which can drive them mad i guess. hahas. bar actually can be really fun for me apart from the pressure and stress during crowded periods of course.

on the other hand, the amusement of pple around me does helps to lighten my mood at times during work. i guess i am slowly knowing them better which makes me do not feel like quitting at times. growing attached to the pple there and familiarising the environment.

anyway glad that i was able to meet up with twin for dinner at her workplace after work. then there was surprise visit by angeline and wenmin while we were eating! hahas. haven't seen them for quite a while. after dinner, we left and walked to boat quay and then to clarke quay to enjoy the nightlife! hahas quite weird cos pple were trying to pull us to their places to eat when we were not interested at all. some spoke in weird languages which we didn't understand. saw many interesting things along the way. we were tempted by the pretty cakes at one of the shops and decided to share one and talk at the same time. it was rather nice though.

sometimes, taking your time to stroll and walk along nice scenery, accompanied by nice company and taking a short break from working is a luxury to me at least, for now =)

yet, i still haven made the final decision for my applications. been postponing it for a long while. i guess its really time i made my final decision. i am in a dilemma.

my desire for the particular course is there, still there is a constant fear of not being able to get the course after year one. if this happens i will really be disappointed and lose my direction in life. sometimes, looking at pple around you choosing this particular attractive and popular course makes me tempted to follow them as well. still, i think that i shld not blindly follow and may regret in the future if i realised its not the right course for me and i am not suited for it. sigh. perhaps i shld juz follow my heart and interest instead of being suayed by others' decisions. its my choice afterall.

hope by these two days i would make my decision soon, i really hope to get over, not thinking about it anymore.

- peace out

Friday, March 16, 2007

tues:

today's day at work seemed rather draggy and long for donno wat reason. i was juz longing for work to end so that i could relax and meet up wy and grace for dinner! that's the only thing that kept me going before work ended. we went for macs at marina for dinner and ate rather alot until we were bloated. the sofas were rather comfortable and we sat for rather long and talked. i want more outings soon with pple i haven't met for long. work has made my life somehow more boring than before.

friday:

it was great meeting up with wanyi and wenxin for lunch at j8 after a long while =)

it was rather amusing and i was rather hyper at certain times. hahas. we took long to decide wat to eat before eventually picking pastamania as our main lunchie plus a dessert treat at swensons.

our choice of weird flavours doesn't seemed to be paid off. some tasted really weird, we rather normal flavours next time.hahas. wenxin was rather disgusting, playing and eating pepper on ice creams! 0mg. super gross. the pistachio ice cream wasn't as nice as we expected, ended up playing games for the loser to eat it. i lost most of the time. lol. fun videoing wenxin of her funny actions =)

juz saw a video of the current batch of syf handbellers performing. i miss the sound of handbells and having fun playing and creating nice music. memories would be kept in my hearts =)

- peace out

Sunday, March 11, 2007

i broke down at the very end. i tried my best, but i guess its still not enough. i need more time,but it can be really stressful that i can't take it. sigh. perhaps its my expectation of myself that led me to be upset.

i guess this will be a challenge for me to overcome and i hope i can do it soon juz like in the beginning when i started. i did it. i believe i can do it again. perhaps its juz the inferiority i feel in front of the pple whom are so experienced. furthermore, i am not a very fast learner.

still, i appreciate those around me whom tried to cheer me up and make me smile although i couldn't at that point of time. sometimes i wonder why i can't be strong like some pple and even when i am upset or angry, suppress all my feelings in my heart and not express it unwillingly in front of others. haiz. i guess this is juz me. i shall learn to be stronger but its really not easy.

but still to me, i guess crying is a form of de-stress as well, to vent my unhappiness and let myself feel better rather than keeping it in my heart. sometimes, after a while when i think back, i would find myself rather dumb to actually cry over certain things. bleah.

hopefully things will get better i really do hope so as days go by. now, i may have to consider about my decision i made a few weeks ago. wonder whether i shld continue and stick to my initial decision or change? sigh. its a big question mark in my head.

now, there seemed to be so many impt decisions that i have to be faced with which makes me confused. hope i will make the right choices. working has taken much of my time that i don't have much time to think of these things as well. i guess i will need to sit down one fine day and force myself to think before the deadline approaches.

- peace out

Friday, March 09, 2007

finally met up with tong and carelyn for lunchie before work today! its been a really long time since i last met them esp. carelyn whom i didn't seen since o levels ended. although it was a short meeting of only about one hour plus, it was fruitful and we can catch up with one another's lives. a pity i had to leave for work otherwise we could chat much more.

work was rather bad cos i accidentally spilled some drinks on the floor. sigh. i been clumsy these few days need to be more careful. it was a crowded night and i was exhausted by the time i ended work. thankfully tmr is an off day for me. i need more sleep.

- peace out

Thursday, March 08, 2007

working has been fine these few days except i broke my second glass today while washing the cups and glasses. i think i was daydreaming that i juz let go of it suddenly breaking it. sigh. anyway been starting to get use to doing bar and the stress comes as i progress. i hope my speed will improve asap and then make drinks as fast as i can without panicking too much as well. through this, i also have to change my bad habit of being an untidy person cos i can't be like tat if i doing bar or everything will be messy. i shall learn to change and do better soon i hope.hahas.

today is the first time i went back for dinner at home since i started working a couple of mths ago cos i've been going out usually if i worked morning shifts. otherwise i would be stuck doing till night. i do actually miss my mum's cooking though and it is much nicer than those food i eat almost everyday outside.

- peace out

Saturday, March 03, 2007

i feel lost, where do i proceed from here? follow my interests or follow the big bucks future that u may be guaranteed. i need direction.

i did felt disappointed in myself when i saw the results although it wasn't that bad. perhaps its juz my expectations that i set on myself. but i guess i will accept it and continue my life right since i can't change facts anyway.

thanks to all who tried to contact me to find out if i am alright and gave me words of encouragements. i appreciate it =)

on the other hand, i had a shopping spree today with twin in a way to make myself happier perhaps? hahas. i bought a pair of shoes, a tank top, 3 pairs of earrings and ate quite alot of nice food. at least i feel happier now =)

we were bored and didn't feel like going home yet so we went to esplanade to slack and talk.hahas. finally took the nice fullerton hotel!

- peace out